Random rants

Probably the best thing that I have grown to love about working night shifts is the way it has affected my eating habits. Basically, I now have no idea what time I am supposed to eat and whether what I am eating is lunch, dinner or just merienda. So the result is, I have grown accustomed to eating just a small amount of food. If rice is served, I am usually ok with just 1 cup and even in most cases, less. If you know me, you know that that's a huge accomplishment.

I feel I am losing some fat in the process... although subsequent checks with the weighing scale atumotically disqualifies that theory. But fuck the scale, really. I feel the belly has been reduced a bit, and I feel "thinner". Whatever that means...

But other than this, working on GY shift is fucking horrible. I can understand being able to live with this for several weeks or months, if you are a single guy. But a family man cannot survive on this for too long... I don't fucking care if they're paying me this much. I have basically lost my life to this nocturnal work shift. I dont get to meet with friends, I dont get to do activities with my family, and I can't stand trying to readjust back my body clock every goddamn Monday.

My company has announced that the Manila office is closing on June. So it's either you get retrenched, or you get offered to move to the US. 2 of my colleagues have been offered, one of them rejected it and the other one will probably take it. I am still the odd man out. Don't really know why they have held out the decisioin on me for this long... but something's bound to come out. The US offer isn't really that good. Of course I mean this in comparison to the other possibilities that have begun to open for me here. Getting a US Visa is great... plus the fact that you get to bring your family with you, but the compensation isnt really that fantastic. Specially since my "new opportunity" would already allow me to be recieving almost the same amount here in Manila. So in retrospect, if I go to the US, I'd be living a so-so life based on what they offered to keep me, at least contractually for the next 2 years. But if I stay here, I'd be living a very comfortable life based on almost the same salary the US is offering, but now with a different company. Tough choice really...

My final interview for this "new opportunity" is tomorrow afternoon. I have all my fingers crossed for this one. The best thing that can happen is, I get this new job together with the ridiculous salary that I have asked for and then win the 2 projects that I am working on from my previous company. And the chances for both of them are really looking good right now. If we win, I was thinking of buying a new car, but now I know I should buy a house first. Maybe some bank-acquired property somewhere in the metro that has been depreciated. At least get something so I dont have to pay P180K a year for a big apartment that will never be mine anyway.

My wife and I were at the mall most of today looking at some new furniture. Practically, we saw several things we wanted to buy... a new sofa set, a new coffee table, and a new AC for my daughter's room. Everything totalling to about P60K. I almost bought everything right then and there. Good thing I hesitated. I told myself that I'd wait to see how my interview goes first, and then we'll see if I still wanna buy the stupid velvet sofa.

And then we passed by the Lacoste shop again. Funny how having all these money now has changed the way I look at these expensive stores now. I used to cringe in fear whenever I see prices from these designer shops. Last week, I bought myself a pair of Lacoste shoes, and 2 Lacoste shirts. Also bought another pair of shoes from People Are People because it looked to good to pass. Now that I've thought about it, I just bought myself 4 pairs of shoes in the last month. Of course I know that one of the main reasons I indulge myself with these things is simply because now I can. I'm not the snotty little kid anymore... I am swimming with the big fishes now, Dad.